And now the Post-Award Show Awards

I’m no style guru.  My Crocs and socks could inspire fashion police brutality.  But I have to ask, “what was the deal with the dresses at the Academy Awards?”  Most of the actresses looked like they were tangled in drapery. Here are some of the awards that had to be cut because of the time it takes to walk onto a stage with a window treatment around your ankles.

The “Film That’s Most Like a Conversation with a Crazy Person” Award: Babel. 

At first Babel is new and very interesting but then you realize what had seemed like brilliance is just random bits of different stories that never amount to much.  Babel’s long-suffering theme is alienation.  It works. 

The “He’s Made Nearly Every Great Movie Ever so We’d Better Award Him Before He’s Part of the Death Montage” Award goes to:  Martin Scorsese.

The Departed is a very good movie but it is not this year’s Best Picture.  It moves along at a bloody, breakneck pace until suddenly it’s over and you’re wondering if maybe the scriptwriters got whacked too.

The “This Movie has Meryl Streep and That’s About It” Award goes to:  The Devil Wears Prada

Prada is not Oscar-worthy.  It’s a rental best saved for a snowy day.  Although Streep could show up in a home video and it might get nominated. 

The “It’s About Time Someone Wins who Resembles a Real Human” Award goes to:  Forrest Whittaker.

Forest Whittaker is probably best known as, "you know that guy, the one with the funny eye?"   Now we know him as Mr. Whittaker, Academy Award Winner. In the Last King of Scotland he plays the charming 1970's Ugandan leader, Idi Amin.  It couldn’t have been easy.  One moment Amin is like everybody’s favorite Uncle, all warm and friendly; the next he’s like your crazy Aunt without her meds, but instead of a rolling pin she has a nation’s army. 

The “Little Girl who Must be in a Home for the Mentally Unstable” Award goes to:  Ivana Baquero

Baquero plays Ofelia in Pan’s Labyrinth.  I have no idea how you get an eight-year-old to understand and react to the horrors of a civil war, but it can’t be healthy.  Baquero displays at once girlish charm and wisdom way, way beyond her years. 

The “Hey, Bubba, Look at Me Now” Award goes to:  Al Gore

An Inconvenient Truth deserves merit for making volumes of science and, even more amazingly, Al Gore, interesting, but I think the Academy missed one of the best docs of the year.  It’s called Heart of the Game and could be considered Hoop Dreams for girls.  And it made me cry happy tears. 

The “Real Best Picture Award” Award goes to:  Little Miss Sunshine

Which is more harrowing, chasing the mafia or surviving the typical family road trip?  Give me a gun and a flak jacket and I might get back into a car with my brother.  But like a road trip, be patient, Little Miss Sunshine gets you to its destination in grand style.

No pop-ups, no intrusions.  It really is YOUR space.  www.viewmylife.com.

Comments

[Jeep]

We had just recently rented "The Departed" and thought it was kind of entertaining. It took Larry half the movie to tell the two main characters apart because Leonardo and Matt looked alike to him,so he was a little confused for awhile. But Academy Award's Best Picture????? Not even close. "Little Miss Sunshine"had it by a mile. Grandpa died, but there was no blood or violence and even the kids could watch it. Anyway, I'm going to move "Heart of the Game" to the top of my Netflix queue. Your crazy Aunt Jeep (on meds, no rolling pin)

[MurphMan]

Dude, you continue to crack me up. Just like Good Times Burgers, you're gonna be big!

[Ashley E. Kingsley]

Dude,
You nailed it. What a nightmare! And Jack Nicolson with a bald head? Just didn't work. Little Miss Sunshine all the way!

Can't wait to see some Spring Comedy!