You know your trip to NYC is doomed when...

You start by missing your flight.

Then you get there and your 400 dollar-a-night hotel room smells like meat and doesn't have Internet.

You wake up early to get video of a conference but the light is low and the sound is crap. And the one guy of all the guys you're supposed to meet has his flight accidentally cancelled.

Your supposed to take and upload video, but the Microsoft building where they're holding the event doesn't have Internet (really Bill?)

Your trip to find a coffee shop that has Internet is thwarted by sheets of a pounding rain.

You offer to help set up the afterparty and get lost carrying a box of party supplies in New York City. 

You wake up weary and ready to go home, only to find you booked a flight for Sunday, not Saturday.

The bastards at United Airlines charge you 150 dollars to change your flight.

Your seatmate is a dog, which is neat, but it's a nervous, gassy dog. 

Oh, there was the one good thing when you met someone with whom you could share a cab to get to LaGuardia and you saved twenty bucks.

You get to the Denver airport and get on the bus to the satellite parking. Only to find out it's the wrong bus. The bus driver is really cool and goes way out of his way to get you to the right parking lot.

You feel compelled to tip him twenty bucks.